Another thing

If all of time stopped for a while, no one would know. Maybe it stops all the time, and we just can't measure it. It could even stop for really long periods of... of... yeah.

Mental suggestion

I just had a thought for a story while thinking about the phrase "mental suggestion". Since a story about a man who hypnotizes someone into murdering the person that the hypnotist wants dead would be predictable and cliched, a story about a fellow who hypnotized a fellow hypnotist into thinking that he had hypnotized the first fellow into murdering someone, allowing the first fellow to murder someone and than be cleared once the hypnotized man admitted to hypnotizing the first one would be a fun and entertaining story.

Unless I'm not making sense because it's late.

Island Man

Here's another of my songs. I wrote it last Labor Day weekend, along with Clue and a couple others. It's my second favorite, after Clue. 


For maximum impact, it should be sung with a strong Jamaican accent.






Island Man

I'm on an island

with some tropical heat

but my island's in

the middle of the street

My island's not

quite up to the hype

it's your more non-

traditional type

The ocean has been 

replaced with land

just a lotta asphalt

and a handful of sand

It's still an island

an island to me

it's just a traffic

island, you see

I'm on an island

but I can't get free

All the cars are

trapping me

They're on all sides

They go by so fast

I can't find a

way to get past

I'm on an island

and it's really great

except for all the

times I hallucinate

Gotta lotta visions

They're all caused

By too many fumes

of exhaust

I'm on an island

and it's hard to see

All the smog

can't be healthy

I'm on an island

got a cooking fire

 made it out of 

one old tire

I'm on an island

There's not much to do

to kill some time

I can make a stew

Using roadkill and

other stuff I find

maybe I'll throw in

that pumpkin rind

I'm on an island

and the only fish I see

are at the Skipper's 

restaurant next to me

I'm on an island

here I make my bed

on the curb 

that's painted red

I'm on an island

But it's hard to sleep

All the trucker's horns

are so darn deep

I'm here all day

I gotta lot of time

If you pass by

could you spare a dime?

re: ugg

         I just heard from a friend at my community college drama class that they're going to re-boot the Fantastic Four movies. They'll get someone else to play Johnny. So it's not such a travesty after all. Problem averted.

A comic strip

I find it hilarious. However, some people don't get it. See if you do.

http://dresdencodak.com/comics/2006-07-24-girl_vs_bear.jpg

Thin Air: part three

REDACTED


bum bum bum! Sorry, this one needed to be reeled in.

ugg

Why is Chris Evans playing Captain America? He can't be both Captain America and Johnny Storm, so they'll have to cut the Fantastic Four out of the movie universe that they're building with the Avengers movies. And so the FF will lose the only hope of redemption from their two lame movies. How fail, to use the vernacular.

And Ioan Grufford was in a good role that time, too.

Mandy with a beard

While browsing youtube recently, I found a spectacular clip.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OZfoFAs2u4

It's from the David Letterman show. The guy singing is Mandy Patinkin, an actor/singer most famous for his role as Inigo Montoya in The Princess Bride. According to a few youtubers who posted on the video, Mandy and Tony Randell, some other famous guy, would occasionally drop in on Dave's show on their way to Broadway, joking around about how they were late.

They heard that the show wasn't going very well, so they decided to let Mandy give an impromptu rehearsal to spice things up. All the laughter during the clip is because it was completely and therefore delightfully unexpected.

This is proof that Mandy Patinkin is epic.



Side note: You might remember my post ranting about youtubers over here. I recant my position a bit, since they helped me to appreciate the video with their background information on it. But they're not completely perfect... One person only commented:  "hes hot with a beard... go mandy!", which doesn't restore faith.

Bucket List

Here are a few things that I genuinely want to, and feel as if I stand a good chance of getting to, accomplish in my life. It's most definitely not exhaustive, and I'll probably add more.


1. Get a small tattoo of the word "GULLIBLE" somewhere discrete, such as a shoulder.

2. Get a pet tarantula.

Horatio

He doesn't consider others' opinions as much as he focuses on his own principles and his own values. He's always striving to serve his own selfless principles without accepting other viewpoints. This would be more obviously a bad trait if he weren't always correct, and if the world in which he lives wasn't as black and white as it is. Horatio's unrepentant judging manner always serves him well because that's how the stories are composed. In the real world, his values and opinions would be less fair due to their restrictive, ones-sided view. Nobody's really right in their judgments all the time. The fact that Horatio thinks he is always right is annoying, even though he always is. His dogmatism isn't realistic, and I like the truth more than fantasy. It least when it comes to character integrity.

As a corollary, he's too perfect.

Also, he doesn't have much of a sense of humor.

And he smells.



The movies aren't all bad, though. I like it whenever Pellow grits his jaw and says "Hornblower!" in a praising yet gruff tone. That's the best.

Also, I realize that my diagnosis might be wrong. Unlike Horatio would, hehehe. Ahem. Anyway, if you're one of my many friends who love Hornblower, feel free to disagree with me. If you mention bits from the movies that disprove my opinion, I can watch them to figure out if I'm wrong.

Mysteriously Unsilent

        Celery is not a thing to share with any man. Alone in your country inn you may call for the celery; but if you are wise you will see that no other traveler wanders into the room. Take warning from one who has learnt a lesson. One day I lunched alone at an inn, finishing with cheese and celery. Another traveler came in and lunched too. We did not speak--I was busy with my celery. From the other end of the table he reached across for the cheese. That was all right! it was the public cheese. But he also reached across for the celery--my private celery for which I owed. Foolishly--you know how one does--I had left the sweetest and crispest shoots till the last, tantalizing myself pleasantly with the thought of them. Horror! to see them snatched from me by a stranger. He realized later what he had done and apologized, but of what good is an apology in such circumstances? Yet at least the tragedy was not without its value. Now one remembers to lock the door.

~AA Milne




I found that today while taking a practice test for AP English, and I liked it so much that I tracked it down afterwards.

Thin Air: part two

REDACTED


oh no! sorry, folks. Keep chugging through the blog, I have a lot of other interesting stuff, I promise.

Jeeves and Wooster

 I might have mentioned before that I'm pretty fond of the old TV show Jeeves and Wooster. The British humor is phenomenal, and the slapstick compliments it well. Also, I've been compared to Wooster before, both due to manner and looks.

So I have three youtube videos to show you, none of which tell you much about Jeeves and Wooster, but all of which are related to them in some strange way.

First, here's a metal version of the theme song.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Xld4lB-M1U



Second, here's a video comparing them to Kirk and Spock of Star Trek. It also has the original theme song, in case you wanted to hear what it sounded like without the metal.






Third, I have a music video set to an abridged version of Professor Higgins' "Hymn to Him" from My Fair Lady. Yup, the same one you like, Brenna. The video's one of the well put together types, and is therefore the best version of that song on youtube, in my opinion.

Kavka's Toxin

Kavka's toxin puzzle is another paradox, this time created by the moral philosopher Gregory Kavka in 1983.

Here it is described in his own words:

An eccentric billionaire places before you a vial of toxin that, if you drink it, will make you painfully ill for a day, but will not threaten your life or have any lasting effects. The billionaire will pay you one million dollars tomorrow morning if, at midnight tonight, you intend to drink the toxin tomorrow afternoon. He emphasizes that you need not drink the toxin to receive the money; in fact, the money will already be in your bank account hours before the time for drinking it arrives, if you succeed. All you have to do is. . . intend at midnight tonight to drink the stuff tomorrow afternoon. You are perfectly free to change your mind after receiving the money and not drink the toxin.

(He can tell whether or not you intend to drink the poison with a high-tech machine that he has. If you really need a justification for thought experiments, then the back story is that he's trying to test out the machine. That still doesn't make much sense, since he's paying you a lot, and he didn't really need to pick a toxin, but he's eccentric. The weirdo.)

The problem: can you fully intend to drink the poison if you know that you don't have to? You'll always know that you don't reallllly have to drink it.... but if you think that, then you won't get the money.

I think that the solution is to intend to drink it regardless of whether or not you get paid. Then you'll get paid. The only flaw is that you then won't have to drink it.... ....and you'll know that earlier.... so you won't fully intend to drink it.

I guess you'll have to drink it, be violently ill for a day, and get a cool million in cash

Side note: Wikipedia also gives a real-world example of the puzzle: the Political Manifesto.

"Before an election, a political party will release a written document outlining their policies and plans should they win office. Many of these promises may be difficult or impossible to implement in practice. Having won, the party is not obligated to follow the manifesto even if they would have lost without it. In this example, the Electorate is the equivalent of the Billionaire, the Manifesto Promise the equivalent of the intention to drink the toxin and implementing the policies is equivalent to drinking the toxin." ~Wiki

I found this funny because of that last bit: to politicians, implementing promised policies is equivalent to drinking toxin. Hehe.

William T. Stead is the man

http://www.worldmag.com/articles/16581

Horatio Hornblower. Man, I dislike that fellow.

Thin Air: part one

Redacted, most sadly. Send me a message, and if I trust you enough you can have it. Your chances are low if you're a random guy from India, I'm afraid.

My tag

This is The Random Tag. I have composed it myself as revenge upon those who have tagged me in the past. They must now complete it. Or... or... or else. And check out number ten. Haha! Maybe you'll all think twice before tagging me next time. ::evil smile:: 



1. How many toes do you have?

Ten.

2. How many bones have you broken?

I'm leaning towards one, despite what Sophie says. I was playing ninja tag last May and flipped a guy over my back, hurting my little finger quite a bit in the process. It now has an extra lump on it, and still feels a little sore after 7 months. Maybe it was only fractured, though.

3. Name an epic thing that you have done.

I was playing Janga, a game where you pull out chunks of wood that have been stacked to form a tower. You place the pieces of wood on the top of the tower, and the point of the game is to see how long you can keep making the tower more unstable before it falls down. The pieces of wood are stacked with three on each level of the tower, and one of the levels was missing the left and right sections of wood. So I flicked out the middle one, letting the tower fall down, yet remain upright. So I actually stabilized the tower more. .... it was epic at the time. Maybe you had to be there.

4. If you had a pet lemming, what would you name him?

Edwardio the Under-achiever.

5. What color are the clothes you're wearing right now?

Just black, and a sort of grey-purple. But I'm not being emo, that's just the color of my pajamas. I'm writing this on a Saturday, and I don't have to be anywhere. :)

6. How awesome are orca whales on a scale of one to ten?

They're a seven. No, wait, that's okra whales... mm, tasty. Orcas are more like a 2.

8. How old do you want to be when you die?

Pretty old. 80-something. It'd be nice if I wasn't senile at the time, but I could live with that. Haha, "live" with it... Funny. Anyway, I'm not on board with those of my friends who want to die young. Scaredy cats.

9. Name a pet peeve and an addiction.

Pet peeve: intentional ignorance. Addiction: catchy musical numbers.

10. Write a paragraph detailing your life. 100 word minimum.

First, I was born, an experience that I am thankful not to remember. As I recall, until the age of five or six, I was a quiet kid. I then shifted to being a cranky, irritable, and vaguely sarcastic kid during the ages of seven-ish to ten-ish, after which I mellowed out a bit. So it's sort of like I went through my teenage years as an eight-year-old. Now I think I'm about due for a mid-life crisis... Anyway, from about age twelve up, I began to evolve into a pleasant, easy-going type guy, non-competitive but with a penchant for curiosity. I'm also either an extroverted introvert or an extroverted introverted extrovert, I haven't figured out which yet. Aaaand that's over 100 words.

11. Name one thing that isn't really a secret, but that you haven't really gotten around to telling anyone.

I don't like scrambled eggs very much. This is funny, because my family has always eaten them once a week, every week, for Sunday breakfast, for as long as I can remember. I've never really felt like explaining to anyone that I don't actually enjoy eating them. But I guess Mom will find out if she reads this blog.

12. Name another pet peeve.

Small talk. I'm not that good at it.... I usually come across pretty good for a few minutes, but then conversation tends to stall. Deep conversations are a lot more fun.

13. Sprechen Sie deutsch?

No.

14. Tell a joke.

Q. What's the difference between a duck?

A. One of its legs are both the same.

Hehehe... that one cracks me up.

15. How many of the questions have you answered in a witty manner so far?

Only 4 or 5... But I've been having fun making up the questions as well, so I get points for that, too. :P

16. Compose a haiku.

Silent, still; the thinker
Applies his brain, but forgets
The proper syllable allotment

17. Have you ever noticed how sour candies taste even more sour if you rub them on the side of your tongue?

Yup, that's how I was able to ask that question. It's cause the glands that taste sour the best are over there. The sweet glands are on the tip, and the sour glands are in the back. I forget where the bitter glands are... maybe I'm confusing them with the sour ones...


18. What book(s) are you reading at the moment?

Oh... just one, I think. The Man Who Was Thursday. It's fascinating, and I'm now inspired to talk like all of Chesterton's characters do. Witty yet insightful philosophical commentary is the way to go.

19. How many doors are there in your house?

Wow... lemme think about that one.... 19. Counting garage doors and sliding closet doors.

Hey, 19 is the number of this question, too! Cool.

20. How would you solve a problem like Maria?

I'd replace her with Mary Poppins. Not only does she look absolutely identical, but her manners are impeccable. And she has experience as a governess as well. I think it would work out just fine.

21. Think of something about yourself. Anything. Go on, think of it.

Now think of something more interesting. Write it down here.

Something more interesting: I dislike it when people say something obvious. This makes sense, since it's actually predicted by my Jung type. However, I also dislike it when people say something that I've already figured out, especially when it's something tricky to notice. I think that the two are connected, but the latter is a little more selfish of me.

22. What's wrong with your legs?

Well, I banged my left knee last Friday, so it's bruised. Also, I've been able to crack my left ankle ever since I was eleven or so. Either gymnastics did it, or I've always had that trait, and just hadn't noticed before.

I don't get any weather tips from them, though.

24. What's your favorite show tune?

At the moment, You've Got To Pick A Pocket Or two, from Oliver!. But that's probably just because I'm listening to it as we speak. I also like Marian the Librarian, from The Music Man.

25. Okay, you can tell us what that first thing you thought of for number 21 was. We all want to know, even if it isn't interesting.

I like bagels.




I tag Grey, Problematic, and Escapist, as they are the people who I remember tagging me. If I missed anyone, he or she is also tagged. And anyone else who wants to do the tag is welcome as well.

And hey, I completed it in time for Easter weekend, just as suggested. Or wait... I guess that was the suggestion for the posts I was tagged in. Well, I'll still do those. Sometime.

Adam's debate tips

Since I've been graduated from debate for a year now, I though I'd share with all of you a few tips that I picked up. I'm sure that they'll considerably help anyone who cares to use them in Team Policy debate in the NCFCA league.

Warning: the following tips probably won't make a whole lot of sense to any non-debaters, as they use a few pointless buzzwords. Don't worry, you're not missing much. And my next post will be cooler anyway.


DEBATE TIPS

--if you notice that you’ve dropped an argument, but the other team hasn’t pointed it out yet, and you don’t want to use time to bring it up again, restate your side to the judge and tell him that it was dropped. Don’t mention who dropped it.

--remember, counter plans have unlimited fiat. Use this to your advantage.

--if it’s to your advantage, point out that there are no ‘rules’ in debate, just theory. Want to bring up a dropped argument or a statement made in the CX? It’s all good.